Life is what we make it. I learned this from a song on the Disney Show, "Hannah Montana". She finishes the sentiment by saying: "So Let's make it ROCK!"
I love that. There could not be a truer reflection of the real ME than that statement because it combines my Rocker side with my Philosopher side. I also really deeply appreciate how those words have shaped and molded the drive and ambition my daughter Annika has. Those are the words of HER generation. I still feel them though. So read at your own risk because I am about to tell you how I REALLY see my life...and it WILL be a reflection in gratitude, so be advised that I am once again tricking you into reading about and thinking about GRATITUDE...the greatest ATTITUDE there is.
My work and my Home are one. I have tried in the past to create a distinction where the two can be separated but it has never worked and it never shall. There have been times when this overlap was difficult for other people who lived here in the home to accept, but I am happy to say that we have really struck a balance with it and the entire system functions well....great even! A typical week opens up for me early in the morning with the arrival of my nephew for Daycare. He is 3 and he is my son's best friend, Tyler...TyTy as we call him. I love being up early. It's not always easy but when I discipline myself to do it the benefits FAR outweigh the effort. My Step-Daughter Daly is an excellent motivator for morning exercise and I can already see that mornings in the summer could be the best times I have had in years...whether it's a morning run, jog, walk...walk on the beach or even Yoga on the beach...I am loving it. I love the combination of exercise and meditation and what I just described provides both! We live in the perfect neighborhood for it. Two Blocks up Preston Drive we have a Private Beach Access...another two blocks from there on Nausauket road is a second Beach Access. The Nausauket Access point has the distinction of being a short walk (at low tide only!) to the Beach inside of City Park. At low tide, the rolling beachfront there is prettier than any I have seen on cape Cod! And THAT my friends...is MY neighborhood. Amazing right?
So when I think of mornings, I realize the benefits and opportunities available to me before I even sip that morning Java. And let's talk about that for a moment...how satisfying is coffee? And how available! I can go to any major Supermarket, healthfood store or bodega and find the most delicious blends of home-brew. I love that morning coffee! Sometimes David and I will sit outside and drink our coffee while watching the Boats floating in the Marina. We have what is known as a Terciary Beachfront property which means we are 3 houses up from the beach. It just happens...and I KNOW this is the LoA...that we have a beautiful view from where we live despite not being right on the water. Several houses around us do not have the view we have. We are BLESSED. The cool air in summer brings the salty smell to our doorstep and reminds us of the wonders of living in a state that is by the ocean...another blessing! Many of the things that cause me to want to leave RI and take up living in Florida have to do with the ocean.
This morning as I write this, I am looking around and taking stock of THIS moment and what I love about it. I have a great cup of coffee. My son and I are on our Front porch which is a lovely place to listen to the birds as we eat breakfast, write and enjoy each other's company. I think there must be some sort of Bird Sanctuary nearby because the Springtime Birds in our neighborhood are so loud that they wake me up at 4am sometimes! But now it is closing in on 9am. Lex has a small decorative tray with wheat toast and butter and orange juice. He is nestled into a comfy chair with his favorite Ducky blanket and his cowboy pillow...not eating...LOL. I am writing here at my table. Which is another thing I am grateful for ! My Laptop, my Printer, My Internet access and my Blog! I can continue and be amazed at what I DO have rather than what I lack! I have a cell phone...and so does my daughter. We have 2 flat-screen High def TV's in our house. I can think of people who have none. We recently disconnected our Verizon Tv service...this practically devastated David! But....and perhaps I am the only one who has noticed this....we have all been talking to each other more and spending time with each other. No surprise to me!
Let's consider something a bit more intimate. Ourselves...our bodies and our features that are always with us. Shouldn't we show more gratitude for those things over any other? I mean, no matter where I live, work or vacation...I always bring my body, mind and spirit. So let me start by saying that aside from a few moments here and there...my Spirit is very much at peace with my life. I nurture it and show my spiritual side respect. Mentally I struggle more, but ultimately I also respect my thoughts...I have learned that I must be in control of them at all times in order to be a healthy person. I determine what I dwell on...and I fill as many moments as possible with the thoughts I CHOOSE to dwell on. Like for instance right now I have chosen to light one of my favorite lavender candles! The soothing fragrance is nice, but the fact that I Love lavender and I earned money and then bought my candle and the holder and then placed it here on the porch and then lit it this morning is something I am GRATEFUL for. I feel RICH beyond words because I could do each one of those things. I Hope I live to be 100 and always be able to have the money, the will, the ability and the desire to do something like that. If I do, I will be a success! And as far as my physical attrtibutes go...well, let's just say it would be TOO easy to complain...so I will start with the fact that I have a comfortable wardrobe of cotton clothes. I am wearing a soft one-piece romper that has a tub top. I can feel my long hair tickling my back...it falls beyond the middle of my back now. My long hair is pretty amazing to me since it shows I have the restraint to let it grow and be at peace with it unlike my former self who had to be constantly changing in order to be happy. This new approach has helped me to see the things I love about my physical body. I love my skin and my hands...they both endure SO much for the sake of others! I have a pretty face...not the same as when I was 16 or even 29...but I still feel beautiful. I am tanner this year since I have started embracing the naturally warm undertones of my Italian heritage instead of fearing that my "delicate Irish" skin would be too fair for the sun. So now I see who I really am! I have a warm Olive glow with LOADS of brown freckles...and you know what? It totally suits me! I know very few other women who have this type of skin. My children don't! They seem to have no Irish at all...they have beautiful warm toned skin, dark hair and dark eyes, While my hair is dark but my eyes are a lighter color...a beautiful shade of green!
So let' talk Career then! I was thinking this morning about part of a book I read recently. The woman in the story was a professional Chef and Cookbook Author. However, she was struggling to meet her writing deadlines because she had given up her chef career to raise 3 children who were very young and to do this she worked from her home in her free time. She reminded me of myself in the best possible ways. There were moments when she was a total mess but that GENIUS that was inside her never went away, it just had to stay on reserve until a better time to come out. This is me too. I have great potential in my career but I have to focus on my children right now. I feel I have plenty of time to do all the things I want to do and I continously offer gratitude for the hope of a Long and Healthy life to fullfill these dreams in!
I have amazing friends and I have to be thankful to FaceBook for the easy way I am able to maintain those friendships, promote my daughter's Acting Career; give my Blog a place to be found; Organize and Publicize Events; share my Vacations that I am passionate about; Publicize my ChildCare and Event Planning Businesses and just be there for friends! I am BEYOND grateful that there are even 5 people who read my Blog! Thank you. I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart!
~namaste~
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
My real feelings
I have had a lot of people in my life tell me that I do not express my true feelings...that I hide them. That I create isolation that creates unhappiness for me. If this is true as I suspect it might be, I have been working on this over the past year. The Secret has helped me identify this quality to some degree by teaching me that unhappy feelings block my magnetism, lower my frequency and keep me trapped in an unhappy cycle of behavior and mental status, and an unsatisfying life. I don't actually need my friends to tell me that I hide myself from the world. It make me laugh though because those who say it are doing the same themselves...we all do it...every single person on the planet who has ever had a reason to hide anything does it. Only very young children don't do it. Their innocence and lack of experience with the ways of the world is the only thing separating them from being a hider like me. I don't consider it hiding though. I consider my decision to be uber-private these days as a way of not only protecting myself and my interests but also to not burden others and to make myself more available to the needs of others. The less I am focusing on my own "troubles" or issues, the more my mind and heart and physical body are freed up to think of others and their needs and wants. I prefer to put my attention and energy there and take care of myself privately. I also feel that the answers to everything I am pondering do not exist in the outside world. They exist within me.
What I want from life...and what I desire in life are the same as what I NEED in life. I basically have what I need and therefore most of what I want. My deepest desire is really just to have increased feelings of satisfaction on many levels...career, family, sex-life, romance, finances, travelling, meditation,health, exercise and my physical appearance. I have dreams that are very large and I do not want to compromise. I have made certain choices and those are pretty well set-in-stone for now but I refuse to feel holed-in by them. If there are areas of my life that I am needing to improve and I cannot improve by my own action alone, I will simply choose to see whatever is positive in it and carry on as the happiest person I can muster-up being. I feel very motivated by the criticism of a lot of people in my life these days. Everyone seems quite critical to me lately. Since I am a magnet, I suspect I am either being critical of them, critical of myself or critical of some other situation or people because anything I do to others comes back to me. Otherwise, it could be my insecurity feeding that thought that people are holding me in judgement. Either way, this is a typical "AngelMarie" flaw that needs work. No time is better than the present to change for the better and so here and now I release this negativity and I refuse to care, notice or be concerned about anyone being critical or judgemental of me. I will strive to be, do, look, feel, and present myself the best I can. I also vow to myself and in front of any possible audience I have who may read this, to do things the Right Way...so that I can draw only blessings to me.
Now let's talk for a spell about my improvements...my progress in these areas. Since reading The Secret and the other literature that followed it, and then puttting these ideals into practice in my life, I have grown a lot. I was able to witness many miracles and be a pivotal figure in the growth and development of others and myself. I am grateful for being exactly where I am now and who I am now. I am grateful to have received these blessings and I know that my life IS a blessed life. I am MORE blessed than others because I appreciate and see what I have and I feel...really FEEL...good and grateful. I feel elevated today because that is what gratitude does. Gratitude raises your "frequency"...your vibration...mental vibration. When that happens, new opportunities always follow because whatever stagnation or negativity WAS in tune with your vibration is forced out of it's place. This is why I am so sure and SO confident that the answers to every problem I have lie inside of me waiting for me to meditate and discover it. My life is about ME. My children's lives are about MY CHILDREN. We all create the life we need and want. My kids are very blessed to have me as their mother because I am willing to sacrifice everything I want and desire to serve them best and make sure that they have the happiest life imaginable. Many years ago, I used to meet with a Therapist. She showed me that my negative thinking...the "spiral" as I call it...was the root cause of my depression and my anxiety. It was not beneficial or useful. My negativity was destroying me. I still struggle with my negativity, especially in some areas....BUT...my awareness of it and my decision to DO something about it, have been making my life better and better each passing month.
Now. Today. This week. This Month...I am facing new difficulties. But...I am grateful that I have been given the understanding of the root cause and I have been shown evidence to support certain feelings and intuitive thoughts I have been having. Many things feel like a mystery even now but that just means that I am not in the right place to make a permanent decision or assume a position of absoluteness. At these type of crossroads, I must pause...sometimes for a long while...as I continue to observe the Universe showing me the way. I BELIEVE that ALL GOOD THINGS are meant for me. I KNOW with confidence that I am supposed to have everything I desire and want in life. If what I have now is not what I need, desire, or want in life then the Law of Attraction will become a Force of attraction and work on my behalf. All I need to do..my part...is to SHOW LOVE to everyone and everything and demonstrate gratitude on every occassion I am given...even the ones where I would be disappointed or unsatisfied. This is an area I need work on! Once again I will say it: There is no better time to start then right now!
~namaste~
Monday, June 13, 2011
How to Know it All
I wish there was a Secret Ingredient that worked for every person everytime in every situation under the sun to fix every problem. When it comes to correcting deficiencies in oneself, it is best to take them one at a time. Recently, my friends and family have been advising me to face my issues this way. There are a lot of opinions going around about the best way for me to live my life. But perhaps the best advise I am receiving is to pursue my ambitions...everyday...with my whole heart. Is that what some people refer to as Self-Actualization? Let's check the dictionary...
Okay, so it means to develop one's full potential. Excuse me for sounding like a pre-teen having a tantrum here, but today I have heard this one too many times. That being said, I am attempting to place my life under a microscope and see what I find. What are my goals? What should my goals be? Are these 2 things the same? Ideally that should be a yes. Perhaps, sincce this is supposed to be a "How-to" guide, I shall lay out some steps here. We always refer back to the Law of Attraction. So....the LoA says that everything is governed by Love. To be Self-Actualized and Meet my calling and true potential and highest potential in life, I must:
1. Know what it is that I love
2. What I LOVE should be what I am striving for in life (my goals)
3. I should think about what I love and nothing else
4. I should Act on what I love and nothing else
5. My life should reflect things I love and not be cluttered by other things that affect that energy.
So with my short list here, I can set out to know it all! I have made lists of what I am grateful for and what I love. I use those lists when I need focus...when everything seems negative. But for the sake of making this article concise and easy to follow...and myself be the guinea pig of the experiment...I shall insert some of my own feelings into the categories. What do I Love?
answer: I Love My Kids (Annika and Alex), I Love the Ideal of a happy family, I Love hard work and earning my money, I Love a Home, I Love to Travel, I Love to commune with Nature everyday.
I am striving for these things in life....definitely. I want the best outcome for my children. I want a happy home-life. Thinking in wider terms, it is easy for me to let go of ideas that are too specific and realize that I have the capacity to enjoy these areas of my life and I can maintain them best by focusing with positivity and love upon them. As I read this back, I am thinking that the majority of people in the world want similar things. It is not that hard to achieve. As Shakira sang- we can have it all. I believe that, so why do I limit myself? We all limit ourselves.
Ok...Let me continue to fine tune. This is a written/mental exercise for me, so if you are reading this and it sounds a bit like babble...perhaps it is not my best blogging but it is honest...straightforward. I am having a tremendously difficult time focusing on my goals and principles. It should be easy, but I keep going astray. No one can give you your convictions. You must acquire them yourself. Others can offer encouragement on your path, but only YOU can fix you. I am trying to fix a problem in my life...one I have talked about in previous blog entries. I have a wonderful family. My Children are exceptional little people...they are clever and intelligent and deep and beautiful. No one is without flaws so of course, there are some trouble areas, but I am totally in love with my kids...a fact that I wish were always true but it is not always the case and so it bears repeating: I AM IN LOVE WITH MY KIDS. They are my world. I have twice given up careers to be with them during their formative years and be their primary caregiver and main influence. So when I consider the course I should be on in life it includes, supporting my kids physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually, educationally, and offering them the best life has to offer. This is my first goal in life.
My second item on the list is an "Ideal of a Happy Family" which is my subtle hint that a Loving Partnership must exist in order to have the kind of harmony at home that creates the Happy Family. As far as this goes, I am afraid that in my life I have not found this balance at all. My partner and I have done too much to create difficulty and not enough to guarantee that we will be able to come together lovingly. So this area is under construction for me right now. I feel that I ought to maintain the details as private, but if this part of life doesn't resolve then there can be no happy ending.
Let's turn to Hard Work, earning my Money and having a Home. For me, these three things are pretty well tangled together. I earn an income by working from my home...using the resources in my home and I do my best to create a proper home environment for the beneifit of the family while giving clients the best experience I can using the same resources. It is a challenging way to earn a living but it has been working for years now and therefore, I do treasure it. I am blessed to have many nice clients who are supportive and flexible and caring. Our children are getting their needs met and so there is a definite synchronicity happening.
When it comes to travelling, I do travel more often now then I ever have in the past. I have discovered many ways to make travel possible, even without a personal vehicle. I have many treasured experiences from trips we have gone on. I cherish my memories of them and I believe that many more voyages and journeys lie ahead for me and for the children. Having faith and believing that things will get better is a very important part of the process of manifesting and showing gratitude. It is by gratitude that I can use the Law of Attraction to magnetize the things I desire so that they can come to me.
The last item in my list is Communing with Nature. I find this much easier to do than ever before. I take time to appreciate the ways that I am surrounded by nature. I take walks in the park...on the beach and just in general take in the beauty of trees, flowers, and other plants...we are growing a garden...we play outdoors in the yard. These are a few ways I am working to make my enjoyment of nature a heightened experience and thereby increase my happy feelings...and my frequency and my vibration. Once that Happy Vibration is going strong, many good things appear in life. Striving for Happiness and for feelings of happiness has become my life's task! It is a noble thing to fight for and perhaps one of the only things worth fighting to have! I cannot control all situations but I will work tirelessly to elevate myself...my mood and my attitude. I can do it.
Thanks for listening! ~namaste~
Okay, so it means to develop one's full potential. Excuse me for sounding like a pre-teen having a tantrum here, but today I have heard this one too many times. That being said, I am attempting to place my life under a microscope and see what I find. What are my goals? What should my goals be? Are these 2 things the same? Ideally that should be a yes. Perhaps, sincce this is supposed to be a "How-to" guide, I shall lay out some steps here. We always refer back to the Law of Attraction. So....the LoA says that everything is governed by Love. To be Self-Actualized and Meet my calling and true potential and highest potential in life, I must:
1. Know what it is that I love
2. What I LOVE should be what I am striving for in life (my goals)
3. I should think about what I love and nothing else
4. I should Act on what I love and nothing else
5. My life should reflect things I love and not be cluttered by other things that affect that energy.
So with my short list here, I can set out to know it all! I have made lists of what I am grateful for and what I love. I use those lists when I need focus...when everything seems negative. But for the sake of making this article concise and easy to follow...and myself be the guinea pig of the experiment...I shall insert some of my own feelings into the categories. What do I Love?
answer: I Love My Kids (Annika and Alex), I Love the Ideal of a happy family, I Love hard work and earning my money, I Love a Home, I Love to Travel, I Love to commune with Nature everyday.
I am striving for these things in life....definitely. I want the best outcome for my children. I want a happy home-life. Thinking in wider terms, it is easy for me to let go of ideas that are too specific and realize that I have the capacity to enjoy these areas of my life and I can maintain them best by focusing with positivity and love upon them. As I read this back, I am thinking that the majority of people in the world want similar things. It is not that hard to achieve. As Shakira sang- we can have it all. I believe that, so why do I limit myself? We all limit ourselves.
Ok...Let me continue to fine tune. This is a written/mental exercise for me, so if you are reading this and it sounds a bit like babble...perhaps it is not my best blogging but it is honest...straightforward. I am having a tremendously difficult time focusing on my goals and principles. It should be easy, but I keep going astray. No one can give you your convictions. You must acquire them yourself. Others can offer encouragement on your path, but only YOU can fix you. I am trying to fix a problem in my life...one I have talked about in previous blog entries. I have a wonderful family. My Children are exceptional little people...they are clever and intelligent and deep and beautiful. No one is without flaws so of course, there are some trouble areas, but I am totally in love with my kids...a fact that I wish were always true but it is not always the case and so it bears repeating: I AM IN LOVE WITH MY KIDS. They are my world. I have twice given up careers to be with them during their formative years and be their primary caregiver and main influence. So when I consider the course I should be on in life it includes, supporting my kids physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually, educationally, and offering them the best life has to offer. This is my first goal in life.
My second item on the list is an "Ideal of a Happy Family" which is my subtle hint that a Loving Partnership must exist in order to have the kind of harmony at home that creates the Happy Family. As far as this goes, I am afraid that in my life I have not found this balance at all. My partner and I have done too much to create difficulty and not enough to guarantee that we will be able to come together lovingly. So this area is under construction for me right now. I feel that I ought to maintain the details as private, but if this part of life doesn't resolve then there can be no happy ending.
Let's turn to Hard Work, earning my Money and having a Home. For me, these three things are pretty well tangled together. I earn an income by working from my home...using the resources in my home and I do my best to create a proper home environment for the beneifit of the family while giving clients the best experience I can using the same resources. It is a challenging way to earn a living but it has been working for years now and therefore, I do treasure it. I am blessed to have many nice clients who are supportive and flexible and caring. Our children are getting their needs met and so there is a definite synchronicity happening.
When it comes to travelling, I do travel more often now then I ever have in the past. I have discovered many ways to make travel possible, even without a personal vehicle. I have many treasured experiences from trips we have gone on. I cherish my memories of them and I believe that many more voyages and journeys lie ahead for me and for the children. Having faith and believing that things will get better is a very important part of the process of manifesting and showing gratitude. It is by gratitude that I can use the Law of Attraction to magnetize the things I desire so that they can come to me.
The last item in my list is Communing with Nature. I find this much easier to do than ever before. I take time to appreciate the ways that I am surrounded by nature. I take walks in the park...on the beach and just in general take in the beauty of trees, flowers, and other plants...we are growing a garden...we play outdoors in the yard. These are a few ways I am working to make my enjoyment of nature a heightened experience and thereby increase my happy feelings...and my frequency and my vibration. Once that Happy Vibration is going strong, many good things appear in life. Striving for Happiness and for feelings of happiness has become my life's task! It is a noble thing to fight for and perhaps one of the only things worth fighting to have! I cannot control all situations but I will work tirelessly to elevate myself...my mood and my attitude. I can do it.
Thanks for listening! ~namaste~
Friday, June 3, 2011
Empowerment...how to get it and how to keep it
I was looking into the definition of this word in order to best compose this blog when I discovered a link online that I wish to share:
http://www.empowermentillustrated.com/
The website listed begins with a "redifining" in modern words and thoughts, what Empowerment and Self-Empowerment actually mean to us. The most poignant part of this definition for me is inside the meaning of self-empowerment:
"Empowerment seems to come in 2 flavours:
- one with benefits to both an empowerer and those empowered. I propose to call this type simply 'empowerment'.
- another where power is created out of nothing by somebody who previously perceived themselves to be powerless and then woke up to their own power.
This could be called 'self-empowerment'."
So the reason I have taken on such a task as to write about this subject is all based in some personal feelings I am having about myself and about others around me. In particular, and not surprisingly so, I am thinking of the MANY women in my life and how they either feel powerless or have actually lost power by negativity from situations that are happening or have happened or have been happening for a long time. Sound familiar right? It should...we are ALL there together..each and every one of us except for the truly enlightened. The question is...what are YOU doing about it? Do you personally recognize the power you hold to fix problems in your life or have you given up? Perhaps, like so many other women, you have given the power to someone else to handle your problems for you. Well I am here to tell you that you can fix your life yourself. You do not need someone else to fix it for you. Let me give you some personal examples. And I must first tell you that had I not read The Secret and studied it...and read The Power and applied it...and read more and more literature from similar thinkers to Rhonda Byrne, I could never have evolved to the person I am right now who is telling you this. You have the Power to make your life whatever you want it to be.
Let's start by talking about debt. This is something I am very familiar with. Money has plagued me most of my life. I was raised in a poor family. We struggled for everything. My Dad and Mom frequently made it known to us kids that there wasn't money for things. They taught us to believe that we were the wrong type of people...not the kind who acquire wealth but the kind who struggle. This is a self-fullfilling prophecy and propaganda that was fed to our parents who fed it to us. The longer we continue thinking this is true, the longer it will be true. I became a broke young adult...struggled although I worked several jobs at a time my entire life and still do. I went to college and wracked up student loans; Bought a car that was reposessed; filed for bancruptcy; wracked up credit card debt. This is my profile. I look like a loser on paper, don't I? I did exactly what my parents believed of me and taught me to believe of myself. Until last August when I read The Secret and decided it was all a lie. I decided that I could be a person who loves money...not a person who fears a lack of money. I decided that part of my daily meditation would be on abundance. I have many techniques that I now use to visualize money in abundance and a full bank account and all the bills being covered. I took the necessary steps when signs were shown to me and I took back the power from my Creditors who were trying to take advantage of me. I signed up for a Non-Formal Debt Resolution and it has made all the difference in how I feel about myself. I recognize that my spending habits were frivolous and irresponsible and that is how I allowed myself to become victimized by my Credit Card Companies. These days, I think long and hard before making purchases that are not for cash. Even cash purchases...I think long and hard before I open my wallet.
Does any of that sound familiar to you? Perhaps you have some similar problems? Maybe like me, you have allowed people to tread on your generous nature. I was once told that I was a "bleeding heart". It really bothered me that anyone would call me that. Inside I did not feel empathy towards people when I was allowing them to treat me like a doormat. No way! I felt ANGER. I just didn't know how to stick up for myself and so I hid my anger behind a pleasant smile...a soothing veneer. So I heard the words and then I decided to pay close attention to what was going on around me. How do people speak to me? Why? What do their remarks, questions, answers and conversations really mean? What are they saying with their body language? What are they NOT saying? When I changed my approach to the people around me, I learned everything I needed to know about them and about me and about my relationships with each one individually. I have no problem now when I need to address questions, concerns and problems. I feel a confidence I never had and I see solutions that were previously beyond my understanding. In some cases, I have become wiser than the ones who taught me. I find myself much in need of a spiritual guide these days...a wise and learned teacher.
It is much harder to find enlightenement in relationships. For this, I have a younger but wiser teacher. She is a strong woman. Adversity and hardships...some of which I may have inflicted upon her at some point, have made her the amazing woman she is today. It goes to show you...never ever burn a bridge. Never, ever. Anyway, her wisdom is far beyond her age and I appreciate that I am blessed to learn from her and what I have learned that has been most valuable to me is to let problems simmer a bit. Don't jump. Be patient...with the person and also be patient when deciding the right course of action to resolve the problems that arise. I tend to jump in and be a woman of action- a true fireball. Sometimes action is not the right course. I have found in my personal relationships that overlooking an insult...letting a problem simmer a few days before addressing it and in some cases, just taking information and storing it away for later use, are all better techniques than a fight. Sometimes there is just no way to talk something out. Some things need to just be felt. When it comes to LOVE relationships...Love must be felt. If you are wondering, "does he love me"? ...just allow yourself to feel his energy for a while. Does it feel loving? What does it feel like to you? Don't ask yourself what he is thinking or what he is doing. Focus instead on what motivates him. That is the root of who he is after all. Is he motivated by money? Sex? A good business deal? Travelling? Food? Ego??? The deeper motivations will guide the actions, thoughts, behavior and feelings. If you are tuned into that, then you can answer all the questions you have about the other person.
Then comes the time for action right? Just like with my debt, there was a time for action. A woman I know was recently complaining that her Father failed to complete a job on her car that he started. As she went on complaining about her Father and her car, I realized that what she needed to do was Empower herself and free herself of expectations that would never be met by the Father. I knew she would not be happy when I suggested the problem was hers rather than his. She wasn't happy. But...I think she listened. You see, I asked her how she felt when she first got the car on the road. She said she was happy. Her happiness was motivated by having a car of her own. So now that there were mechanical problems, she was mad and hated her car. And then she projected the anger onto the person who's own personal life problems were affecting her ability to get her problem resolved by him. I suggested she bite the bullet and pay more to have another mechanic fix the car issues and then her car would be back to running well and she would be happy again. I suggested she EMPOWER herself to solve the problem rather than allow this other person to control the situation and let her down.
Are you starting to see how empowerment works? It's very exciting when you really grasp it! I have been watching for signs of synchronicity and seeing things come together in the most unexpected ways. The idea of Empowering yourself to take action or inaction or just to bring about the necessary changes to improve your life or cope with difficult situations is the greatest FREE gift you can ever get. It is free to those who ask and it is rooted in LOVE, the greatest power and the only power and THE power of life. Everything comes from Love and this includes Power. Power is a dirivitive of the great force of Love. What you Love, you will have and you will draw to you and you will have the Power to keep.
~namaste
http://www.empowermentillustrated.com/
The website listed begins with a "redifining" in modern words and thoughts, what Empowerment and Self-Empowerment actually mean to us. The most poignant part of this definition for me is inside the meaning of self-empowerment:
"Empowerment seems to come in 2 flavours:
- one with benefits to both an empowerer and those empowered. I propose to call this type simply 'empowerment'.
- another where power is created out of nothing by somebody who previously perceived themselves to be powerless and then woke up to their own power.
This could be called 'self-empowerment'."
Let's start by talking about debt. This is something I am very familiar with. Money has plagued me most of my life. I was raised in a poor family. We struggled for everything. My Dad and Mom frequently made it known to us kids that there wasn't money for things. They taught us to believe that we were the wrong type of people...not the kind who acquire wealth but the kind who struggle. This is a self-fullfilling prophecy and propaganda that was fed to our parents who fed it to us. The longer we continue thinking this is true, the longer it will be true. I became a broke young adult...struggled although I worked several jobs at a time my entire life and still do. I went to college and wracked up student loans; Bought a car that was reposessed; filed for bancruptcy; wracked up credit card debt. This is my profile. I look like a loser on paper, don't I? I did exactly what my parents believed of me and taught me to believe of myself. Until last August when I read The Secret and decided it was all a lie. I decided that I could be a person who loves money...not a person who fears a lack of money. I decided that part of my daily meditation would be on abundance. I have many techniques that I now use to visualize money in abundance and a full bank account and all the bills being covered. I took the necessary steps when signs were shown to me and I took back the power from my Creditors who were trying to take advantage of me. I signed up for a Non-Formal Debt Resolution and it has made all the difference in how I feel about myself. I recognize that my spending habits were frivolous and irresponsible and that is how I allowed myself to become victimized by my Credit Card Companies. These days, I think long and hard before making purchases that are not for cash. Even cash purchases...I think long and hard before I open my wallet.
Does any of that sound familiar to you? Perhaps you have some similar problems? Maybe like me, you have allowed people to tread on your generous nature. I was once told that I was a "bleeding heart". It really bothered me that anyone would call me that. Inside I did not feel empathy towards people when I was allowing them to treat me like a doormat. No way! I felt ANGER. I just didn't know how to stick up for myself and so I hid my anger behind a pleasant smile...a soothing veneer. So I heard the words and then I decided to pay close attention to what was going on around me. How do people speak to me? Why? What do their remarks, questions, answers and conversations really mean? What are they saying with their body language? What are they NOT saying? When I changed my approach to the people around me, I learned everything I needed to know about them and about me and about my relationships with each one individually. I have no problem now when I need to address questions, concerns and problems. I feel a confidence I never had and I see solutions that were previously beyond my understanding. In some cases, I have become wiser than the ones who taught me. I find myself much in need of a spiritual guide these days...a wise and learned teacher.
It is much harder to find enlightenement in relationships. For this, I have a younger but wiser teacher. She is a strong woman. Adversity and hardships...some of which I may have inflicted upon her at some point, have made her the amazing woman she is today. It goes to show you...never ever burn a bridge. Never, ever. Anyway, her wisdom is far beyond her age and I appreciate that I am blessed to learn from her and what I have learned that has been most valuable to me is to let problems simmer a bit. Don't jump. Be patient...with the person and also be patient when deciding the right course of action to resolve the problems that arise. I tend to jump in and be a woman of action- a true fireball. Sometimes action is not the right course. I have found in my personal relationships that overlooking an insult...letting a problem simmer a few days before addressing it and in some cases, just taking information and storing it away for later use, are all better techniques than a fight. Sometimes there is just no way to talk something out. Some things need to just be felt. When it comes to LOVE relationships...Love must be felt. If you are wondering, "does he love me"? ...just allow yourself to feel his energy for a while. Does it feel loving? What does it feel like to you? Don't ask yourself what he is thinking or what he is doing. Focus instead on what motivates him. That is the root of who he is after all. Is he motivated by money? Sex? A good business deal? Travelling? Food? Ego??? The deeper motivations will guide the actions, thoughts, behavior and feelings. If you are tuned into that, then you can answer all the questions you have about the other person.
Then comes the time for action right? Just like with my debt, there was a time for action. A woman I know was recently complaining that her Father failed to complete a job on her car that he started. As she went on complaining about her Father and her car, I realized that what she needed to do was Empower herself and free herself of expectations that would never be met by the Father. I knew she would not be happy when I suggested the problem was hers rather than his. She wasn't happy. But...I think she listened. You see, I asked her how she felt when she first got the car on the road. She said she was happy. Her happiness was motivated by having a car of her own. So now that there were mechanical problems, she was mad and hated her car. And then she projected the anger onto the person who's own personal life problems were affecting her ability to get her problem resolved by him. I suggested she bite the bullet and pay more to have another mechanic fix the car issues and then her car would be back to running well and she would be happy again. I suggested she EMPOWER herself to solve the problem rather than allow this other person to control the situation and let her down.
Are you starting to see how empowerment works? It's very exciting when you really grasp it! I have been watching for signs of synchronicity and seeing things come together in the most unexpected ways. The idea of Empowering yourself to take action or inaction or just to bring about the necessary changes to improve your life or cope with difficult situations is the greatest FREE gift you can ever get. It is free to those who ask and it is rooted in LOVE, the greatest power and the only power and THE power of life. Everything comes from Love and this includes Power. Power is a dirivitive of the great force of Love. What you Love, you will have and you will draw to you and you will have the Power to keep.
~namaste
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