On February 13th 2011, I changed the course of my life with a single spontaneous phone call...and as they say, the rest will be history! Already so many amazing situations have come along and experiences that I am grateful we have gotten to have! From this point forward I feel a greater sense of control over how to manage each step of our path. I had been hoping for a new adventure for my career, but I never would have chosen ACTING...or for my child to be an ACTOR! It makes me laugh a little actually, because I still feel like I am being dragged along for the ride (so to speak), and yet, I have to do all the researching and calling and typing and paying and ordering and listening and asking. I find it extremely rewarding in a way. It is wonderful to use my skills of negotiation, and my strong skills at marketing, networking and just creating relationships in general. The Acting Business is all about relationships. And not as people may think- "it's who you know"- when actually, as Adrian R'Mante has taught us, it is more about WHO knows YOU.
And so it is very important to make the proper impressions, make the impressions quickly and never stop smiling. I cannot imagine anyone more skilled at doing this than I am!
So I would like to tell the story of the day of Annika's Audition Showcase. From the beginning of Acting Camp, we were always aware that Celebrity Acting Camp and Adrian R'Mante had the connections and the desire to not only train the children to pass auditions successfully but also to provide them with the opportunity to experience a real audition and hopefully to act as a springboard for their careers. Thus resulting in yesterday's Talent Showcase where Adrian invited Casting Directors and Talent Agents to come out and hear the children audition. There were approximately 50 children and 4 Guests who came to hear the auditions. The auditions were recorded so that Adrian could continue to share with Industry people. On Sunday, inside the Westin Hotel in Providence, nervous parents and young actors lined the hallway of the second floor corridor and waited patiently for their 5 minutes of fame.
When it came time for Annika's audition, she was in there for about 5 minutes which is what we expected. She came out smiling but also ran directly to me and threw her face into my belly. I felt her shaking and sobbing a bit. when I got her to withdraw her face it was red and she had tears in her eyes. I wiped them away, smiling at her and asked, "these are happy tears, right?". She let out a giggle and said "yes! I don't even know why I am crying, I just felt nervous". We laughed and hugged and went on to exchange telephone numbers with a few new friends. Before we had arrived, Annika announced to me that she was not nervous at all. I suspect that her nervousness was more social than anything since there were so many nervous auditioners waiting with her in the holding room for 2 hours.
As we left, I observed her quietly. We held hands as we walked to the parking garage. The air was cool and the city was surprisingly quiet, as was the walk. Her usual chatty nature was much subdued. Suddenly she began, "Adrian Thanked me" she said. I was unsure what this meant to her, but she continued, " he was proud of me because I did not forget anything and I did not need to start over, and there were other kids who did". I was silently pleased to hear this, but I simply nodded as we got into the car. She was not done yet and so she added, "Mommy do you think I will get in?" I quickly answered, "Sweety, you ARE in".
Having been a stage performer during my life as a singer and performer, I could understand the exact emotions she had at this precise moment. I had anticipated it. It is the Lull...it follows the big performance. It is a feeling like what you just did was not significant enough. It should have been bigger, lasted longer or just been better. It is a feeling of loneliness and emptiness only filled by the next big thing. I had expected it. I knew she would need something and so to celebrate, we had invited friends and family for a lasagna dinner at our house. We went to the market and got our goods and went home.
Annika's energy was low, but as our guests arrived and began to socialize and the house became loud with the wonderful sounds of LOVE and FRIENDSHIP, I witnessed the very thing that life is about. My favorite moment of the night was while I was making the lasagna, ALL the kids and Didi and Daly and Danielle were there with me in the kitchen- sitting on the floor and drinking wine and laughing! The day was not even about me and I FELT LOVED. They could have all left me in there cooking but they chose to stay with me! You couldn't squeeze another body into my kitchen!
It all makes sense. Annika was smiling and happy. Everyone was! Dinner took forever to cook but after a nice meal and a "Scene It" game and WHOLE LOT OF WINE and dessert, it was the best day anyone could have asked for! I want my children to remember who the people in the lives are that LOVE them and SUPPORT them no matter what. Even if she didn't notice who they are, I know. And a Mother keeps a record...in her mind and in her heart. I also appreciate those who paid attention to her schedule and sent encouraging notes and well-wishes on Facebook. Anyway, when Annika's career takes off, so does mine. Who would have ever thought THAT would be MY destiny? Life is funny- and this was a curveball I never sawr coming. Well- I am ready. Let's do it!
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